Chelsea Hotel & NYC Adventures

Current mood: sick
Category: Life

This is from yesterday...

Slept straight though the night for the first few hours. Woke up crying again. Dreaming about my mother again. Fall back asleep. More dreams. Bloody and possibly sexual. Then I dream of my mother telling me President Clinton is killed in a car accident. A vision of him bloody appears in my asleep mind.

I have no idea where all this is coming from. But perhaps it is not for me to know.

Tony and I stayed 2 days in the Chelsea Hotel. For the record, let me say I believe in energy, but have never seen a ghost or spirit. There is a definite vibe in that building. We stayed in Room 830. I am not aware of anything particularly interesting happening in there, unlike Room 100, where Sid & Nancy lived, and Nancy was murdered.

We mosdef saw some freaks in the joint.

Day 3 of the last batch of mixing:::We go over the first-ever field recordings I made, in Türkiye in 2000. Some snippets made it onto the records, let's just say...As my mom would have said, it is kismet.

You’re Feeling Old and Your Heart is Breaking

Current mood: mellow

'And before you know/You're feeling old/And your heart is breaking/Don't hold onto the past'
~Madonna

The age thing is a wave, I find. Sometimes I feel age creeping over me, but then other times I feel perfectly youthful, especially given the current average life expectancy. Although, I honestly don't expect to make it past 50 with my family history, etc.

Anyway, a good friend of mine who is about 46 told me he regrets how he felt old when he was younger - like my age, or younger. He's had it all - professional success and a child.

I think this is sound advice. Feeling old is a drag.

If anything, it's the little struggles that don't seem to get easier (enough) that make me world-weary. But therapy helps so much.

The weirdest thing of all is to find yourself changing, changing into someone else, or very different from who you thought you would be. When you were young, how you balked at such things. You knew better...Ha ha. Time has the last laugh.

Spent last weekend in the studio again. Now 4/10 done. Wore a black armband for Tony Wilson. God rest his poor soul. In honor of him, I listened to '24 Hour Party People' about 20 times in a row. It's just as good every time. I meditated on 24 Hour Party People, Party Monster and the Hacienda...Funny, this Nico disc I got a few months back (ATP) has her performing live at the Hacienda BDay Party.

Oh to have been there, or at the Hacienda EVER!

The band is releasing a new song online in honor of the show next week...only a few more days now...

Currently listening : Public Image By Public Image Ltd. Release date: 26 March, 1996